Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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