i just wanna soil my oats bro
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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