first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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