I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
