My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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