I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
