it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
