OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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