My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize