are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
