sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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