Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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