The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
