Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
