every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Randomize
