Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize