So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
YAS. BRING CRAB.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
