its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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