Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
