great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
areolas are like halos for boobs.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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