i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Randomize
