i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
