in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
