Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
