I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
