She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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