Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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