All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
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