this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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