Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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