it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
