she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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