you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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