My nipple is on Facebook.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
