I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
