3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
