i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
