I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize