I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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