Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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