Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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