but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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