did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
