I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize