She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
