at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
