Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
