no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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