she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
