Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Just cropdusted the office
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
