i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
